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19 November 2005
  OH-MY-GOD
James said that today he learned the full meaning of the Brit expression "gobsmacked."

When last we left the house (November 12, last Saturday), it looked like this:

foundation of house

Well, this is what it looked like as of 3:30 p.m. this afternoon:

foundation of house

We figured the framing would be partially or all up, but we weren't expecting the sides nor most of the windows, and the bathroom inserts ready to go in!

I know this sounds funny, but it hit me square in the solar plexus, too. Up till now it's been a bit of a dream, and now it's taking flesh.

Plus I'm...scared. I always figured when you became an adult you quit being scared, except about important things like family members or yourself being sick. My parents seemed so smart...not to say they were never ruffled or angry or didn't have problems, but they met events and decisions with such equanimity that when I was a kid I figured it was a gift that grownups were suddenly endowed with when they hit a certain age: you suddenly knew What To Do. I kinda looked forward to when it happened to me.

Now I realize they were just muddling through just like I am. While at least I don't feel quite so inadequate, I also realize I'm never going to be lucky and "grown up," and automatically know What To Do. Darn.